Fresh off a stunning victory for the tax bases of cities like Palm Beach and Miami, top Florida officials are finally returning to work. The mayors of Florida’s glitziest municipalities have ended what insiders are calling “the most exuberant, champagne-soaked celebration since the invention of offshore banking”—a nine-day gala marking the election of Zohran Mamdani, New York’s new socialist leader.

“Frankly, we haven’t seen this level of excitement since the last hedge fund migration,” said the Mayor of Palm Beach, sporting a novelty visor and a T-shirt reading ‘I ❤️ Rent-Seeking.’ “When news broke that New York was going full socialism, we started prepping the guest houses and firing up the golf carts.”

The Mayor of Miami was equally jubilant. “Our real estate agents are exhausted from all the midnight calls. We had to bring in backup from Boca,” she said, pausing to pop another bottle of sparkling water. “We’re even considering renaming Biscayne Boulevard to ‘Billionaire Boulevard’ in honor of our new arrivals.”

Local businesses have reported a run on monogrammed towels, luxury SUVs, and Ransom application forms. “It’s like Art Basel, but with more panic and less art,” observed one event planner.

As the party winds down and the confetti is swept from the marble floors, the mayors say they’re ready to welcome their new constituents. “We hope New York keeps up the good work,” the Palm Beach mayor added. “And if they ever want their tax base back, they know where to find us—on the back nine.”